Red Devils manager Louis van Gaal is looking to strengthen at right back and had been linked with a move for Southampton’s Nathaniel Clyne, but his reported £20m asking price has put the Dutchman off, with the option of signing the Brazil international for nothing a more attractive option.

The 32-year-old was part of the Barca team that lifted the La Liga title this season, but believes the club have shown him a lack of respect by not offering him the terms he wants on his contract that runs out this summer.


Rumours begin in Manchester, where every shop from the Northern Quarter to the Trafford Centre is stocking up on studded leather jackets, purple drop crotch pants, super longline T-shirts, brightly-coloured blazers and gold shoes in preparation for the impending arrival of Dani Alves. The Barcelona full-back is sick to the back teeth of having to win trophies for the biggest club in the world, play alongside the greatest footballer of all time and being paid a weekly wage bigger than Mount Everest and so he wants out. “I may have two feet in the team but I’ve also got one foot, my body and nearly my head out of the club,” he toys-out-of-the-prammed the other day, while simultaneously revealing the astonishing fact that he has one more foot than the rest of us. So out he goes and off to Manchester.

But which badge will Alves be kissing when he puts in a barnstorming performance in August against WBA before not being seen again till April? The one with Manchester United written on it, of course. Should that deal somehow fall through, the shops will send back the leather jackets, the T-shirts, the blazers and gold shoes (but hold on to the drop crotch pants) and the club will instead opt for Southampton’s Nathaniel Clyne or Schalke’s Benedikt Höwedes.

Speaking of Manchester United. Paul Pogba has said that he would rather rewatch The Perfect Storm in Icelandic as well as look at the 239 stills plus conceptual art with commentary by Wolfgang Petersen followed by the audio commentaries from Petersen and Sebastian Junger than move to Old Trafford, or indeed anywhere in England this summer. In fact, he does not even want a move back home to France, which would explain why Paris Saint-Germain are standing in the corner with eyes redder than the centre of the sun and shoulders heaving hard. No, there is but one club for Pogba, one dream that he can cling to, one dream he prays comes true and that is Real Madrid. “Maybe we are talking about Pogba a bit too much, but if he can keep up his current development he can become one of the best players ever,” opined Zinedine Zidane with some useful, over-the-top filler quotes that are probably a couple of days old but do the job nonetheless. Should that deal somehow fall through, Pogba will instead opt for Barcelona.

Manchester United have placed Dani Alves on their short-list of potential defensive recruits this summer, but will only turn to the Barcelona full-back if they fail to land their priority targets.

Alves, who was 32 earlier this month, is out of contract at the Nou Camp this summer and currently embroiled in a public stand-off with the Champions League finalists over his future.

The Brazilian had been expected to leave Barcelona at the end of the season, but with the Spanish champions barred from signing players due to a Fifa-imposed transfer embargo, efforts have been made to hand Alves a contract extension.

The former Sevilla right-back, who has been linked with Paris Saint-Germain, admitted this week, however, that he has been left unimpressed by Barcelona’s attempts to keep him and United have been made aware of the player’s desire to move to the Premier League.


“From 7 June, I’ll announce my future,” Alves said. “My intention was not to speak, but I haven’t been respected with a lot of silly things.

“It’s gone too far. I don’t want anybody to influence my decisions. My future only depends on me. I may have two feet in the team (Barcelona), but I’ve also got one foot, my body and nearly my head out of the club.

“I would like to stay here but not at any price. Not only in terms of money but in terms of respect.

“If I’m not show that respect, I’ll go to another club. I won’t accept that they underestimate what I have given to this club. They haven’t given me the value I deserve.”

While United manager Louis van Gaal has identified the signing of a new right-back as a key element of this summer’s transfer strategy, the club are currently pursuing other targets.

Interest in Southampton defender Nathaniel Clyne has cooled in recent weeks, however.

United are understood to retain an interest in Schalke’s versatile defender Benedikt Howedes, but Borussia Dortmund centre-half Mats Hummels remains the top target.

Meanwhile, United are not currently pursuing Valencia defender Nicolas Otamendi, despite reports in Spain linking the Argentine with a move to Old Trafford.